Who Are You?
I stand looking in the mirror. I look at the reflection, but don't recognize the face. It's not me. He looks tired, and exhausted. Looks like he's been through a lot recently, but I know he doesn't feel like it's worse than the things he's overcome before. This person used to be strong. He used to be stubborn. He used to do everything to be everything he was afraid that he truly was. He worked hard only to find he was working in the wrong direction. He put focus into things, but overlooked details that cost him great things. He looks like a fighter at the end of the line. He looks at me back. He's lost his fire. The thing that made him feel special. It wasn't a her, but he likes to believe it is. I can see he's not without hope. He's not done he's just lost. He's trying to re-capture the fire he lost somewhere along the way. He doesn't know where to begin his search so he searches in the usual places. Where do you search when you've lost something? If they were in the usual places you wouldn't have lost them. So where do you search? You've lost your identity, and now put forth a hollow version of who you remember you used to be, but it's not the same. What will it take? Faith. Patience. Strength. Perseverance. He doesn't want to know where or how he lost himself. He only wants to find whatever it is he lost. He doesn't want your sympathy, or your pity. He's strong and resilient. He's endured the worst events, bad decisions, and misguided belief. He wants to be seen as he is. He's a fighter. He's durable. He's resilient. He's fun. He's reliable. So many don't see these qualities in him, but they're there. He has been an unrecognized angel for many. To himself he's done more harm than good. His best qualities mirror his worst qualities. His age has taught him he needs to balance them. He tries, but hasn't mastered it yet. He doesn't like to rely on others, but puts himself in positions to have to. He suffers to the last minute fighting to make things work. I see beyond his eyes. You see his decisions, and analyze. I know motive, you have theories. He used to like proving people wrong. He looks back at me. Then he shocks me. He speaks. "I'm lost, but I'll be okay. What about you?" I don't know how to answer. Is he lost or am I? Perhaps I'm becoming him. Maybe I'm the one whose lost.
Who am I?